Archive for the 'Family' Category
June 30, 2010 @ 6:53 am | Filed under: Family,Soul Food
The past seven days have been amazing.
- I’ve come to know my grandfather much, much better.
- I made cookies and drew pictures with Andi during a sleepover.
- I kept a tall pitcher of ice-cold peach tea in the fridge.
- I strolled the aisles of Target! Ahhh….bliss!
- I ate watermelon in the evenings.
- And enjoyed restaurants that I don’t have “at home.”
It was a GREAT week.
But I am home now and almost giddy with happiness!
Home. It is the {second} best four-letter word in the world.
Next to love, that is.
Home Sweet Home
June 29, 2010 @ 9:28 am | Filed under: Family,Pure Sunshine,Uniquely Me
Eight years ago today I became a Nana, and it’s all due to this amazing, talented, beautiful boy that I am privileged enough to call my grandson.
When I married an older man I embraced his life as well. The term “step-mom” has always felt a bit awkward to me considering that Amy has the most amazing mom and has no need for another, step or otherwise.
Instead I’ve tried to be the best friend and confidante that I can be and the relationship we’ve cultivated over the past decade is one of deep trust and sound friendship. I treasure my place in this family.
The day Carter was born eight years ago was one of the most special days ever. To watch the man I love watch his daughter become a mother for the first time was simply magical.
I may have had friends to laugh and question how I felt about becoming a grandparent at the crazy age of 34, but the day Carter uttered “Nana” for the first time I’m pretty sure my heart did a complete cartwheel. Something it’s continued to do through the years as he’s grown.
There will be other grandchildren…but forever and always Carter B will be the first to have dubbed me Nana – a title I bear with pride and joy!
I cherish the times we’ve spent just being together, like this one. And when Carter B shares a bit of his thoughts with me…well, I melt completely. He has my heart. I appreciate how our family just works.
So this morning this proud Nana is sending out a great big “Happy Birthday!” to our grandson! We love you, Buddy!
June 23, 2010 @ 6:04 am | Filed under: Family,Pure Sunshine
Our nieces and nephew...PRECIOUS!
Uncle Mike & I bought these shirts for the nieces and nephew from Zoey’s Attic…the coolest site! Check it out, y’all!
June 22, 2010 @ 8:30 am | Filed under: Family,It's a Girl Thing
My bags are packed and in a couple of hours I’ll be on I-30 headed to my parents’. I’ll be there for the next week looking after my grandfather while my mom and dad take a much needed – much deserved - vacation.
I spent Sunday afternoon going over all the details with my mom: his meds, his schedule, the days and times the nurses and aides are in, his food preferences…
I’m a little nervous, but mostly looking forward to whatever the next few days may hold. I know these times with my grandfather are limited. I plan to soak up each second and make each moment count.
But I have to admit that I’m looking forward to a few other things this next week as well…
TARGET, people!
I’m not a big shopper. In fact, I heard my mom telling someone not too long ago that I didn’t inherit the “shopping gene.” I guess you could call me a social shopper, because I absolutely love our annual cousins’ Girls Only weekend. But you can’t really call that shopping as much as it is just lots of looking, eating, and – my favorite – talking!
I much prefer dropping in to the store for only what I need when I need it, and if it can be purchased online, all the better! Which is a good thing since…
We’re half-way through the first phase of our Big Adventure and, now that I’ve been in Small Town America for a full year, I must say that I am head over heels in love with this way of life. I relish the laid-back atmosphere, I adore the friendliness I’ve found in the community, I appreciate the simple things.
When we removed ourselves from the clutter and chaos, we found a bit more tranquility. But along with that new slower pace of life came the leaving behind of Target, Barnes & Noble, and day spas. If it can’t be found at Wal-Mart or Brookshire’s it’s not likely to make it into our home.
Shopper or not, ladies, you know what I’m talking about! There is something very cathartic about cruising the perimeter of Target because everyone knows that the best deals at Target are found on the end caps!
So while I am sure to be terribly occupied over the next seven days preparing meals and visiting with my grandfather, I am making plans to squeeze in time for a long-overdue pedicure, a leisurely cruise through the bookstore, and a slow and deliberate observation of all the delicious goodness Target has added to their shelves over the past twelve months.
Anticipating it all!
grandparents, pedicures, Target
June 21, 2010 @ 7:18 am | Filed under: Family,Pure Sunshine
“You can’t teach genetics. But you can overcome genetics. I know, because that’s what I did.” ~ Kevin Rogers, 2010
Whoever first coined the old adage: “Family. You can’t live with them, you can’t live without them” must surely have known what it means to be smack-dab in the middle of a group of folks that are capable of making you feel virtually every emotion known to man, times 10.
It means that maybe while we shouldn’t live always within the exact same four walls as them, we should most definitely surround ourselves as often as possible with these people who have our back through thick and thin. We laugh, cry, remember, laugh some more, accuse, apologize, laugh even more, tease, tease, tease, and – LAUGH.
My brother is full of dead-panned one-liners that make me laugh out loud. His sentences are almost always deeply philosophical. So much so that if you didn’t know him you’d be leaning back in your chair trying desperately to make sense of this long string of words that just slipped from his lips.
And Jordan wonders why I so often slip and call him “Kevin…” It’s because his words, his antics, his mannerisms transport me back a few years and it’s conversation and time around my brother all over again. I see glimpses of my childhood in my son and it fills me with wonder at this miracle of family.
It is the sporadic and unexpected spurts of laughter when the conversation turns to Johnny James. We share the awe we feel in the presence of a man so brilliant that he can walk to the podium, speak for 45 minutes on the dot without the use of a watch, can quote the entire Bible, and – in the midst of it all – leave us with an impromptu English lesson as only a truly great grammarian can.
“Grammaria?” My brother pipes up in the middle of my dad’s JJ description. “Is that near Ethiopia? Do you need your passport to go there?”
Laughter.
It’s that deep, gut-wrenching hiccup that grabs you around your middle and makes the faces around you light up, tears to puddle in your own eyes, and holds your heart in its tight, joyous, amazing grasp while you savor it all, drinking it in with a great. big. sense of wonder.
It’s the bubble of uncontrolled mirth that grabs you again after you’re in bed at night. It’s the glee your heart feels as your mind replays the day and the words of your two-year-old niece – like her daddy in so many, many ways – that have you and your husband wiping your eyes in the dark from the sheer deliciousness of shared laughter.
My mom gifted each of the men with Polo Black for Father’s Day. Now – in moderate applications – I’m a fan of Polo Black. But when all three of men open their brand new bottles and apply a squirt or two, joking all the while that we now have a “family fragrance,” it can become a bit, well…fragrant.
So when two-year-old Andi walks into the room, sidles up to her grandfather, and honestly declares, “You stink!” it’s a moment that sticks with you. It’s one of those delightful little pockets of time that we tuck away for days when we’ll all need a moment of levity. A moment to pause, remember, and know.
Know that through it all we are family.
Family.
They are the ones who share our past, our middle, and – if we’re very fortunate – our futures. They’re in it for the long haul – no questions asked. There is no other place on the planet that offers that kind of security. No wonder family is God’s great gift to His children. It is a wonderful thing.
It is, after all, where you learn about gentetics, grammarians, and other stinky stuff!
Family, Father's Day, laughter
June 1, 2010 @ 7:39 am | Filed under: Family
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May 29, 2010 @ 8:26 am | Filed under: Family,Pure Sunshine,Soul Food
Sometimes the things that are left unsaid are every bit as poignant as the things we voice.
It seems as though each time we gather together these days there are silent reminders that we are all participating in something larger, grander, and more heroic than mere words can capture.
Summer is beginning to unravel with all its color and splendor.
We’re making memories – my family and I – breathing in each and every golden moment as it filters through the air around us, and then cradling it close in our hearts. I love these people.
We’ll have these slivers of moments in the difficult months that are sure to come.
Moments when the pain of loss robs us of a good night’s sleep. Moments when there is one less place set at the family dinners. Moments when the landscape of our family is physically altered.
Because in our hearts we’ll always have today.
And today was good.
It was really, really good.
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May 28, 2010 @ 7:30 am | Filed under: Family,Pure Sunshine
Today is my mom’s birthday.
For the first time in 66 years, it was my grandfather who planned her special day.
I get choked up every time I think about it. I have a very distinct feeling it’s going to be one of those memories that will always cause my chest to tighten and the backs of my eyelids to sting.
“I’m going to take you out to lunch,” he called her up the day before to announce. “We’re going to Furr’s. And I’m inviting Faye Nell and Sue to go with us.”
He’s been under hospice care for over a month now and it’s been a time of adjustment for all of us as we’ve all faced in our own way and in our own time that COPD would soon rob us of all the many, many moments we’d come to take for granted over the years.
Ever the strong, capable, unflappable type, the loss of Mama perhaps dealt the cruelest blow to Dad. We’ve seen the love he shared with her evidenced in such unexpected ways since her death. It’s hard to believe it’s been just over six months now; the fact that Dad’s own health has deteriorated so vastly and so quickly is just as shocking.
And yet there are these moments lately when he says or does or acts in such a way that makes that sliver of time almost stand still. It’s as though there is a poignancy in the air and it is so delicate – so precious – that to breathe too hard or even blink would be to miss it.
And oh, we don’t want to miss a moment right now.
The party of four – the birthday girl, her dad, and their two guests – kept the lunch date. Despite the oxygen that is continuously strapped to him, his lack of energy, and an ever-increasing tiredness that is taking over his body, he went the extra mile on this birthday.
He thought he was being quite the sneak, even though Mom knew what he was up to all along. So when the employees of Furr’s arrived at their table and began to sing “Happy Birthday” she acted surprised. I feel quite certain that singing birthday songs tableside is not standard operating procedure for the folks at Furr’s…but again – it’s almost like there is something irresistible about these moments surrounding Dad right now.
They all mean something.
They mean everything.
My mom has had some great birthdays in the past and I’m sure there are some amazing ones in her future.
But there is no doubt in my mind that it is this year’s birthday she’ll remember the most.
birthday, dads and daughters, elder care
May 23, 2010 @ 8:31 am | Filed under: Family,Jorge,Motherhood,Pure Sunshine
Where in the world did the time go?
It seems mere moments ago that he was placed in my arms for the very first time, all swaddled, a deeply placid expression etched on his tiny baby face.
And then I made a mistake and blinked…
Was it not just a few days ago that I held this kid’s hand and walked him into his first day of Kindergarten?
Trying to maintain your hold on your child’s every move and moment is like trying to hold water in your hands…it just trickles through your fingers no matter how hard you try to keep it contained.
Now he’s finishing his junior year of college, working a full-time job, and planning a career.
I look at him these days and I see a man that I love to pieces. He is strong, smart, and deeply compassionate.
He calls or texts virtually every day, always just to ask how I am doing. He is confidante to, and protector of, his big brother Nate. He is a planner like his Uncle Kevin. He is a playful cousin and an interested uncle.
He enjoys coffee and computers, tubing the river with Elizabeth, long talks with Pops, movies with Nate, fun with friends, doing well in school, and knowing he has a solid future in front of him.
He’s my baby boy. All grown up.
May 10, 2010 @ 6:34 am | Filed under: Family,Motherhood,Pure Sunshine
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I realized something last night as I crawled between the sheets and settled down for the night.
I had spent the last couple of hours in the kitchen, planning, cooking, anticipating our Mother’s Day lunch as a family. Robyn’s dad and sister are in town, my mother-in-law is with us, and the day ahead promises to be one full of laughter and great family moments.
It’s been on my mind for the last few weeks that this would be the first Mother’s Day for my mom to ever spend without her mother. I know there is absolutely nothing and no one that can replace Mama; nor would we dare to try. Mama had a personality that was larger than life and this was one day where we would especially miss her presence.
But as I worked in the kitchen last night I was running a mental list of every one that would be at my parents’ the next day for lunch. It wasn’t until later, when I was in bed, that it hit me.
Out of the twelve people who would gather around the table, the only ones still blessed to have their mom are me, Mike, our boys, and my brother. My heart ached for everyone else…for my sister-in-law and her sister, who lost their mom way too young. For my mom, facing the first Mother’s Day as the true matriarch of our family.
The day was a blessed one, full and loud and happy. Little girl giggles, warm hugs, new baby cuddles, animated conversation, and late afternoon mugs of coffee…
And even though we were missing the heartbeats of some very loved mothers, one thing was was felt by all.
The mothering heart.
It is the heart that we share as a family.
And it will always go on.
three generations
