July 22, 2010 @ 6:08 am | Filed under: The Solid Rock,The Writing Life,Uniquely Me
There is nothing that sucks the joy out of creativity – that inate ability to build and mold and design amazing things from the God given instinct that dwells deep in one’s bones – than overthinking. Over-analyzing.
Writing by instinct and getting it right can only happen when my heart and head align with His will. When my own will is supple and pliable, the molding process is relatively painless and the creations seem to flow.
It’s like riding a bike. You don’t read directions on it. You don’t read a book about it. And when you hop on that bike, you don’t recite left, right, pedal, balance, steer. You just do it. And the more you don’t think about it, the better it all seems to go.
And soon, you’re soaring fast, and with flair. Like pastel handlebar streamers whipping in the wind and colored beads in the spokes humming their rhythmic beat with each seamless rotation of the bike wheels.
I try to trust my instincts because they’re good and hearty instincts. I don’t want to worry about ruining the talent or stifling the creativity because I know that would be the worst possible use of my abilities, as limited as they feel some days. But that’s not the woman I want to be. Nor the writer.
So I’m writing like a woman who just simply doesn’t know any better right now. Putting it all out there. Little bits in this synopsis. Chunks of my heart in that manuscript. Layers of who I am in all of it.
Will these words ever see the light of day?
I don’t know the answer to that.
There was a time when that doubt alone was enough to stifle the creativity. To cause me to second-guess, summoning about six kinds of self-doubt that all but clogged the veins of inspiration.
But now I simply write.
I have gained this real, amazing confidence in just putting it out there and doing my very best to create without too much thinking. Without too much censoring, too much second-guessing.
I am a woman who is governed by passion. By love. By the simplistic things in life.
But more importantly than all of these I must be governed by His will and that beautiful principle of….becoming what I’m meant to be.
It’s all about those God given instincts. Not necessarily about getting every word right every time.
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In other news, I’m off today for an exciting few days with the cousins!
It’s our annual girls-only summer trip, and I can hardly wait! Last year, we left my place, drove for two hours, finally stopping for lunch in an amazing little cafe that turned out to be only forty-five minutes from my house! Don’t ask…WE DON’T KNOW !
But it’s those moments with these women (and their precious daughters) that make these trips something that I look forward to for months in advance!
So I’m off to appreciate a few more of those {apron} ties that bind in the best possible kind of way!
Chapter 4 of MELROSE MIRACLE will be up tomorrow though – tune in!
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